Harry Potter Randomness
by xo dana point
Summary: starts off with me talking to myself..than out of nowhere harry potter comes in! Snape wearing a pink dress? Harry Ron and Hermione..actully killing off voldy with a GUN? and Umbridge? what about Umbridge? warning major randomness!


AN: what you are about to read is something totally and completly random..and eer retarded..and some can eevn say its demented cuz well it is LOL this is mainly about me talking to myself going insane becuz my friend wont answer me on the IM box on AIM than it gets crazy i somehow added harry potter characters in there! so beware of demented harry potter randomnesss please R AND R and i will even accept flames just as long as their not to harsh.

Author: ( me talking to my friend or rather talking to myself O.o):

well atleast uir talking now..well i geuss ur not talking. no reallly? i like talking to myself...its actully quite fun. since ur best friend is supposed to be reading this and writeing back. but since my best friend isnt i geuss i can just anoyy the crap outta her. yup yup yup. this is fun im talking to myself can u believe it? the wall that seperates us all..

hey that should be a line for a song yup yup it should! the wall that seperates us all..blocks the waves of the ocean..as ur screaming sweet return to thee...but as the prophecy was told beyound the dream..dont underestimate the power of me. hey thats good! i know isnt it? yup really! and u know what pisses me off is that noones answering me accept myself or u r just really mad at me for freezing ur computer...if it is frozen anyway if it is and u r reading but u cant reply...than i am truly sorry! ya ryte...haha! naw just playing maybe im just a tad bit sorry but thts all. even tho the only reason im doing this is becuz u wont answer me..(haha ur the reader u cant aswer me!) but since ur not i can just anoyy the hell out of u which is really quite fun i might add!

: now i can hear u mate

'WHAT A GIT' ur probably sying but no im not like that sorry i'll just wait for 5 min till u reply.. and read this and than after 5 min..i will anoyy u even more!

My Friend: ANNOY ME'Z IS THAT Z GOLA I THINK NOT: FARRRRRRRRT what the hell?

Author: yeah sure just leave me talking to myself again..and again...

and again....

and again....

and again....

u see? noone tells me anything around here anymore. starting off with u well actully ur the only one i'll start off with sayin uuh i dunno what iim sayin but i think i will be here all night typing to myself...dont u think? yesh i do think! ooh u do? no not really...LIAR! well okay actully i do think....becuz this rate and she's not answering means u'll be here by the time school ends.. wow thats a long time!

My Friend: wow a whole year? gonna get all your homework from the professors?

MeOW SHE SPEAKS!

friend: here im here n payin attention to YOOOOU budday so feel da LOOOOV LOl

Me: iw was actully going insane for about 20 min there really cuz u werent talking and i was insane talkig to myself for a straight 20 min oh joy here i go again what happend to u? what is the crisis that noone wil tell me

me : s. Sherman u do understand that you have made a woman lose her sanity ? i think thats a weeks detention with Dolores Umbridge

friend: NO

Me:shame tisk tisk' if only u were to talk earlier and make the woman sane instead of INSANE she will be here now but for now: I Dolores jane Umbridge will take care of u

bwhahahah u can use my quil and parchment u must write: " I will not make anyone insane"

Friend: aah nooooO!!

Me: and do not ask how many times r it will be as long as it sinks in no?

friend: eew no!

Me: well than I suggest you go out with Dumboldore see Mcgonoggal and him has eeer broken up and he's looking for someone like you to cheer him up!

Friend: uuh no!

Me: and see mr. harry pot head is sick he has been sniffing to much pot i'm afraid and poppy couldnt cure him..poor poor poor poppy! be right back dear i hear mr. malfoy calling me!

Friend: Fk you!

Me: Oh surely not. I am back deray now you have another weeks worth of detention ms. sherman

Friend: joy joy WHY???

Me: for saying that awful word to me! here here here's the quill and parchment again.

Friend: god noooo

Me: and now you must write " I will not go around saying fk you to my teachers"

Friend: noooooo

Me: No? well you were the one who said fk you! noone messes with Dolores Jane Umbridge! for i am the hogwarts high inquistor shitty thing blah blah

friend: Jane?

Me: yes jane! jane is my middle name have u forgotten? it says so n the hearing!but so so u wer enot there ms. sherman for u r not harry potter or anyone of the judges in his heraing that good old percy weasly chap said i would be forced to give u sum atention for u have none but now u do! so u must be happy!

Friend: um...No thank you I can be Independent on my own wihtout your gourgous smile nor help sdo may I please leave? LOL

Me: No no i am sorry!

Friend: why can I not ma'am?

Me;becuz i have much more to tell u! see i am going to put this on my saved convos so i can edit it and post it on as a harry potter funny fic! see one shot!

(as if now her name will be 2 and i will be 1)

2oh...god...

1about a woman who has lost her sanity and became dolores umbridge!: and who is talking to her old friend who is now a student! BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA: but dear i say that will be in the summaryfor i am putting all of this in the one shot!: or i might split it into chapters...to make ppl wiat BWHAHAHA but now on with the story! do u ms. Sherman take thee Draco Malfoy to be ur husband??

2 welll he is hot...

draco waits patenitly

2 but NO i cannot steal my buddayz man! : you see she goes to this school and woul.d kill me slowly if I did: so I

simply cant! (in my mind bwahah)

malfoy who is she???

2 her name is Danish of the food kingdom.. (LMMFAO)

ooh really what a nice name! said malfoy

dumboldore comes running in

Mrs Sherman simply nodded in agreement praying to get out of that pest-infested-joint

MRS. SHERMAN?? said Dumboldore WHO R U MARRIED TOO??

2 grabs marlfoys arm

HIM!!! (i refuse 2 marry dumb old door)

NOOOO I AM NOT A DUMB OLD DOOR! ' said Dumboldore"

" HEM HEM": everyone looked towards the voice

HAHAHA ITS JUST THE AUTHOR

everyone sighs

"hem hem"

u cant fool us this time author! said Malfoy

" I am not the author! i am Dolores Jane Umbridge and i obbject on the mrrige of ms. sherman and mr. malfoy"

Malfoy starts singing " Y O Y CANT U SEE CANT U SEE? U KEEP STAREING BAK AT ME"

"ear are you okay?"said Umbridge

dumboldore comes running in

"OW I SHALL KEEL U FOR STEALING MY WOMAN!"

"AVADA KED------

VOLDEMORT COMES IN

" BUT NOW IM STRONGER TAHN YESTERDDAAAAAAAAY NOTHIN BUT MILE AWAY AND M LONLIENESS CAN TAKE ME ANYMORREEE BUT NOW IM STRONGER"

everyone stares at voldemort

suddenly Harry, hermione, and Ron come running in out of nowhere

"AAAH VOLDY!!" said Harry

: "Harry watch it !" said hermione

"I SHALL KEEEL U" SAID VOLDY

Ron screams

" AAAH BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER POKES VOLDY BOTHER BOTHER BOTHER: said Ron

snape eners

I AM SNAPE THE POTIONS MASTER

author coms in " No shit..." Author thinks up idea

puts snape in a pink fully dress

Snape looks down at his clothes: " AAAH i like prettyfull!!!"

Draco comes to snape and gives him a cheese biscut" my wife no loves me since she wont talk!"said Draco.

everyone waits for ms. sherman to finally speak up. but she wont talk and come to think of it she wasnt even there

" AAH where has my Melon Sherbert icecream go??"said Draco.

: The author pops in

: she has gone to a faraway land

: AAWW he has a nickname for u!!!

draco blushes

Voldy and umbridge and dumboldore get anoyyed by the scence

: sene

harry ron and hermione whisper to eachother "i have a plan says harry" they talk and talk "okay lets go get it": they go out of the room and than suddenly comes back

: "okay on a count of 3 do it" says Harry

" 1"

"2"

" and # SHOOT"

u could here guns shooting voldy is dead!: everyone claps yay!

"hem hem": " under the law of the ministry of magic u r not aloud to kill evil wizards with shot guns.": said Umbridge

" oh really?" said Ron

"yes really i---

guns could be heard and suddenly dolores umbridge layed dead on the floor

everyone cheers and claps!

YAY

SHE IS DEAD

Hermione is very happy and goes" NO MORE UMBRIDGE NO MORE BOOKS NO MORE UMBRIDGE'S DIRTY LOOKS"

everyone suddenly stares at her

just then Fred and george apparte in " did u say no more books?"

"yes" said hermione

"YAY" everyone clapped and cheered

well thats it for the harry potter rama randomness pyscho funny one shot thing!

author pops in

and oh yeah for the insane wacko woman too! who is me!

bye bye all!

the end!!!!


End file.
